Friday, January 2, 2009

Untitled II

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For the second time, I use the "Untitled" post again. Nothing much to say for the introduction, not really having the mood to blog actually if you ask. But to keep my blog fresh, I must post something here. Warning, this post might contain meaningless stuffs for which, only I understands ...

Really...not feeling well after knowing some truth that I've been doubting these few weeks, perhaps months...too long ago till I cant remember when it all started. I envy him, I envy all of them...

Everytime seeing them together makes me a little down. I always care about those who helped and cared for me, and I would like to be with them...

Each time when I saw other people with a talent, I admire them, and I wish that I could be like them too. When I compared myself to them, I found out that I'm just a very ordinary human being with no other talent but very good in copying an artwork and playing harmonica like a fool...

Zodiacs...it show's nothin when it comes to that. I'm still wish that I could be with them, but they just left me alone...

I'm just a dumb a**. Other than being mad in watching Heroes and Tsubasa and xxxHOLiC, insane in playing Final Fantasy series and Kingdom Hearts, and went kisiao after listening to Fish Leong's song, I think I'm really a dumb a** with all the things I listed out...

Eh, I didnt realize that I used a rude word ! But it doesnt matter anymore...

I seem like very unknowledgeable in a certain topics for certain of time. Sometimes I think that I'm just living in my own world which full of imaginations and got separated from the reality. My grand was right, so does my aunts...they scold me with the correct words when I think back...

Lacking the courage to tell her that ... I ...

Over...is it over ... yet ?

Vows...will I ever got the chance to make a vow with her ... for her ... ?

Everything that I've done so far...can you feel it ?

Yeah...perhaps she doesnt know about it, but I would like her to know that ... there're people who cares for her ... withour their notice. I felt the same way that there’s a person who doesnt want me to dissapear, to lost myself.

Oxygen...it felt like oxygen...you're as important as oxygen that I almost cant live without it. But ever since I know the truth and I saw you're with him, I'm a little like ... down. I wanna be friend with him, and I want so much more from you as well, you almost changed my life...just that it felt, strange to become a lamp post...again.

Until that day that I've been waiting for come, will I be alone again ? Will the neglected me be noticed again, shined by the heavenly light called love ? Until that day ... please ... 别告诉她 ... 我还想她 ...

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Life was never meant to be simple, even a simple bacteria have a very complex mechanism happening inside its body. Life is full of surprises, fun, thrill and sometimes tears, anger and disappointment. I'm gonna wrote down every single moment that I faced here, so that I'll not forget what has happened in my life. Follow my Instagram @ Spiky9007

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